I have been starting to feel that "I love my life" spark a lot more lately. This is interspersed with feelings of fear and anxiety as I dive deeper into growing my business, but I've been working on making myself feel cozy and safe.
My photos of my kids help me with that. They become almost like a place where I can go where there is an abundance of love and joy - through my photos I see the best in them, and as a result, the best in myself and the best in life.
My kids amaze me. I really cannot express how much I love them and how that love keeps growing. How much more I love them every day.
That does not mean that every moment with them is peaches and cream. In fact, far from it.
The other day Liam told me I was the "worst mother ever" and that I had "ruined his entire day". This was on Halloween, when I had taken half a day off to make it to the school parade and take the kids trick-or-treating.
Even though I knew it wasn't personal, and that he was just having a moment, it really upset me. It really hurt. It wasn’t just what he said about me but how upset he was on a day that was supposed to be filled with fun.
But I know at the end of the day he was expressing his feelings at the time and I love how deeply he lives life. He is ALL IN.
And Jack - how can I tell you about Jack? For one thing, his smile just KILLS me. He smiles with his whole face, his little cheeks, with remnants of baby chubbiness, bunch up and his eyes sparkle. He is full of big emotions too but he is working so hard and is so brave. He has taken on kindergarten with an aplomb that I really could not have imagined or predicted. His still four year old little self is taking it so seriously, while at the same time having an absolute blast.
If I’m feeling particularly stressed out or anxious, chances are, I haven’t worked on my photos in a few days. I no longer see photo editing as a time consuming chore.
Instead, editing my photos gives me a beautiful opportunity to luxuriate in the most meaningful moments of my everyday life with my kids, and in some ways I can enjoy those moments more fully and deeply than I had the chance to at the time.
I want this for you too - and even though I know it may seem impossible to you, my experience working with hundreds of parents tells me otherwise.
You CAN use photography to connect to love and joy in your life. You CAN take photos that make you feel good as a parent and show you that your kids are self-confident and happy. You CAN use photography to help you be the best parent that you can be.
If you'd like to find out more, I invite you to find out more about working with me. You can sign up for a complimentary discovery session - we'll chat about your challenges and goals and see if it's a good fit.